How The Grinch Stole Tihar – By Jo Anne Pandey and Bijaya Eaton, U.S.A. (adapted from Dr. Seuss’s How The Grinch Stole Christmas)

Everyone up in Nepal
Cherished Tihar a lot.
But the Grinch living just south of Nepal,
He surely did not.
The Grinch was a bully! This whole holiday season!
Now please don’t ask why. No one quite knows the reason.
It could be his head wasn’t screwed on just right.
It could be, perhaps, his shoes were too tight.
But I think that the most likely reason of all
May have been that his heart was two sizes too small.

But,
Whatever the reason,
His heart or his shoes,
As Tihar approached, he started to stew
He stood before Tihar,
Staring up at his poor neighbor,
With a sour Grinchy frown
At the not-quite-so-dark windows
Above in their towns.

For he knew all Nepalis living up there
Were busy making garlands with utmost care.

“And they’re making their sel!” he snarled with a sneer.
“Tihar, oh Tihar! It’s practically here!”
Then he growled, with his Grinch fingers nervously drumming,
“I MUST find some way to stop Tihar from coming!”

For
Soon, he knew . . .

All Nepal’s rainbow of faces
Would join and celebrate in all of the places
Brothers and sisters, and sisters and brothers
All together, Together, TOGETHER
That’s one thing he hated! Together, TOGETHER!

Then he got an idea!
An awful idea!
THE GRINCH
GOT A WONDERFUL, AWFUL IDEA!

“I know just what to do!” The Grinch laughed in his throat.
And he made a quick call
And he wrote a quick note
For Minister This to minister that.

And he chuckled, and clucked, “Now the border’s all closed!”
He grabbed his coat and hat and looked down his huge nose.

“All I need is a scapegoat. . .”
The Grinch looked around.
Scapegoats are not scarce. One soon will be found.
There are demonstrations at the border
They’ll do quite nicely
That will be on their lips
While they drink chai nightly

But then he got home
Slipped into his comfy bed
And another Grinchy idea
Popped into his head.

“They’re together, together, which just cannot be
They’re all too different and not just like me.
The unofficial embargo is so not enough
To keep them apart.
I must go up and practice my art

Of decisiveness, divisiveness, de-nice-ivness.”

In the dark of night
He left for Nepal.
He took the last flight
‘Cause jet fuel, he vowed,
Should be nowhere in sight.

All their windows were dark. Muffled groans filled the air.
All knew this embargo on Tihar was completely unfair.
When he came to the first little house on the square,
“This is stop number one,” the old Grinch hissed.
Then he kicked down the water tank, “You won’t be filling this.”

Jumping to the next roof, he was atop a school.
He looked down inside and said “You fools,|
This will never open again when I have my say.”
Then hackled and cackled and slithered away.

He came across a stupa destroyed in the quake
Then he sighed, “Here, there’s no more mess I can make.
Or can I?” And laughed such a laugh.
He found saffron robes and ripped them in half.

He looked in a window and saw garlands hanging
“Those won’t go around your brothers’ necks as you’re planning.”
He laughed.
“They will rot on those hooks,
Into your brothers’ eyes you will not soon look.

He looked down the street at the empty busses sitting
Visiting family shmamily, you’ve got to be kidding
He jumped on one bus and stomped his big foot
Which fell right through.
He got an idea, he instantly knew
“I can smash all these buses on my way back.
No need for me to cover my track.”

After all this destruction, the Grinch’s tummy was grumbling
He looked ’round for food and found there was nothing
With no petrol for transport and no gas for cooking|
He could search far and wide and he’d still be looking.

He found at the airport, the last bit of fuel.
So he filled his plane’s tank.
But there was a touch left,
Which he promptly drank

On the way home, in the dawn light
He saw a very peculiar sight
Fruits on the ground, veggies all around,
No transport to market to be found

And then the most peculiar sight of all
Herds of cows ready to fall,
Milk still heavy in udders
Inflicting great pain.
No petrol to take milk to market
May as well pour it down the drain.

Safe back in his home, the Grinch checks what he’s done
Searching social media to see how he’s won.
On Facebook he finds Nepalis still spreading good cheer
For Tihar, oh Tihar, was finally here.
Children singing deusi, their voices so clear.

He did not stop Tihar, although he tried.
He did not stop Tihar even with his wild ride.

The Grinch looked in the mirror and, as he shaved,
He thought “If I stop now, they will think I have caved.”
He readied himself for the wave that was coming
But what he received was really quite stunning.

A crowd had gathered at the Grinch Ministry door,
“Please stop this embargo,
You need it no more.

We love Nepal, as you should too.
They are our brothers, let’s do as they do.
They’ve made the best of things, even with no-things.
Togetherness, you see, really is something.”

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(Authors can be reached @ pandeyjoanne@gmail.com)